jamming. live recording of a track, with MPC beat

Yo, I've heard worse! It wasn't bad for someone just starting out! If it's from someone who has been doing it seriously for a long time...then it's really wack! I see potential though. The beat was OK. It reminds me of something Eminem would've done when he was a kid.....**** it he does wacky shit like that now...but whatever. Also, as far as the "political" rhymes go....people don't want to hear straight politics. If you want to get political your going to have to find a different way to do it then just straight up. Your going to have to figure out a way to do it in a story. People love stories with emotion and Drama and if you tie it to a theme that may have a "political" message would work better. It's music, it's got to hit you on an emotional level first, not a mental one. You could have been speaking the most profound shit, but most people would be tuning you out. Also, it doesn't work well having a circus eminem beat with lyrics that are political. I do hear that you can ride a beat. Just practice! Try to emulate what's good and what your feeling....It doesn't mean your biting if your learning from it!

oh and cut out that scienctifical ish. When ever I hear people throwin words in there like that, it just seems forced.

The sample had potential but the beat was crazy stiff, man.. I know fruity loops has a swing setting, right? Try to change up the samples more, use the circus ish as the intro or something. Try to feel the flow more like the others said. But don't give up. Yall sound pretty young still so just keep it alive and strive to do it with passion. Hip-Hop aint a joke homes, it's a culture and you got to respect that and live to promote that culture, not detract from it.
PEace

denzelcollins wrote: Hip-Hop aint a joke homes, it's a culture and you got to respect that and live to promote that culture, not detract from it.
PEace

for real, yo.

Hip-Hop aint a joke homes, it's a culture and you got to respect that and live to promote that culture, not detract from it.

and how am i doing that?

yo i threw big words in there, nto for the sake of using them, there was specific reasons. my goal of this piece was my perspective on people's perspective of hip hop, from the first line to the last.

you'll notice me say alot, "how about..." or "what about" refering to the listener, if im touching on what they think im supposed to be. and the verse isn't done, well maybe, but i was goign to add a 2nd one with more involvement of elements and perspectives i view from people that they have. and to argue sayign i dotn have to feel like including all elements of hip hop, your right i dont, but this is what i came up with one day, and i just went with it. i dont care if you like the content/lyrics/beat, you can all piss on it for all i care, thats not the problem. im doing what im doing for the reason of itself, i aint tryign to impress noone with big words or whatever.

but like i said im only concerned with the actuall application of my rhymes, not the creativity of them, or design i follow.

fu*k it.

peace

i just meant that your friend made that beat "just for jokes" so why do some serious sh!t on it. Im NOT pissing on your music. If you want to do a serious song, no part of it should be just for jokes. If you was like crackin jokes in the verse and having lots of fun with it, it would work with a beat like that, but your not. your trying to make dudes think. you gotta at least make them bob they heads and feel the track before they start thinking about the stuff your talking about

I don't have a soundcard so I can't give you my opinion on the song.....

But I noticed that you are from Berlin. Have you ever tried rapping in german? I find 9 times out of 10 that when people rap in any other than their "born language" (I don't know the term... mother tongue?? Whatever....) it comes off as corny. If you do it in your native language you are bound to have more feeling in it, and it is easier to get your message out, because you say exactly what you want to say instead of saying just what you can!

That's just my 2 cents.
If you enjoy it, don't stop doing it.
Peace-

Berlin - meaning KITCHENER ONTARIO CANADA, berlin was the city's name before the war

and i did say what i wanna say, because i can.

thanks for you input all,

Aight....

That ish's misleading.



Anyway keep doing what you gotta do!

i think that your delivery is the main problem, just that it sounds weak and unsure.

you dont have a commanding voice, where a lot of people dont, but what they lack in something natural, they will make up for with a strong and seamless flow and delivery.

nevermind the lyrics, im not taking them into consideration.

there needs to be energy or conviction in your voice. i feel like you were recording at like 2 in the morning while everyone was sleeping and you didnt want to wake anyone. whyle out when youre doing your thing.

i know you didnt want focus on the lyrics, but im gonna for a second because believe it or not, your lyrics are going to have a lot to do with your delivery. i believe you when you say where someone questioned above your usage of vocabulary for the sake of using it, but youre fitting far too many syllables into bars and your pronounciation is suffering because of it.

ive been writing since i was 15 and im 21 now and over time you will develop techniques to make your life easier. sometimes, you may have to find a similie of the word you want to use with a smaller amount of syllables or, you may need to knock out a few words or a bar if you find it that essential to use those particular words.

only twista can **** with that many syllables effectively, maybe dude from the micro machine commercials as well haha. but look at it like this, you need to predict how every bar and placement of every word is going to work rhythmically and where its gonna fall. ive written verses not to any beat and wasnt too sure how i could work em, got another year experience and went back and banged em out no problem.

just remember homie, music is for listening pleasure. people dont want to listen to you if you have potential to be dope in 3 years or something and you have ultimate quality control over your product, so hone your craft.

exactly^^^^^